Sunday, July 21, 2019

Fleas versus the Paris Opera

Actual size of New Zealand fleas  




When I was 27, I left my oscillating dance career to serve a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Several months earlier, I was living and dancing in New York City. When I left New York, I thought I was returning to my native Utah to marry my boyfriend. But when I returned, my boyfriend had decided his dating days were not quite over. Several months later, I made the decision to serve a mission. After making this decision, I was concerned others might think I was running away from a broken heart. (Admittedly, running away was a part of the equation!) When I shared my concerns with my ecclesiastical leader, he replied, "It doesn't matter." I don't know if he meant: it doesn't matter what others think or it doesn't matter because regardless of the reason of wanting to serve, the decision to serve a mission is still a good idea. So, I made preparations to leave. Besides running away, I did have other- more benevolent reasons for wanting to serve. I had found peace in Christ's teachings and I wanted to share that peace with others.


Opéra National de Paris    

After serving in New Zealand for 6 months, I received a letter from my friends in the 
Nikolais/Murray Louis Dance Company. They were dancing at the Pairs Opera- one of the most famous opera houses in the world! I was jealous and discouraged. I was living in a flea invested basement flat, wearing a navy blue skirt and riding a bike around town! Ugh! My life was definitely not the seemingly glamorous life my friends were living- dancing at the Paris Opera! After receiving their letter, I was at a low point. Straight-away, I did the only thing I could think to do: I went into the bathroom and knelt beside the green fiberglass bathtub and prayed. I cried, "Dear Heavenly Father, is dancing all that bad? I don't get it. I feel so sad." After several moments of pouring out my heart to God, the following thought came to my mind: "If...if you truly want to be like Jesus Christ- this is the way." And so I was taught. Of course, dancing is praiseworthy and a gift from God. And yet, for me, coming to know my Savior required me to serve and share His teachings.


Since returning from my mission 25 years ago, my main goal in life has been to become more like Jesus Christ. I'm grateful for the ecclesiastical leader that saw beyond my immediate heart-break and understood when we serve our Savior, we come to know Him and desire to be more like Him. It's been years since my mission in New Zealand, and I'm far from being like my Savior. Consequently, I will continue to find ways to serve Jesus Christ and learn of Him. He is my exemplar, my master, my brother and my friend. 


Me and my missionary hair, 1993


5 comments:

  1. Mmmm...thoughts running through my heart...We are asked to offer our whole selves. This I know you have done and continue to do! Your life and choices are a clear example of both sacrifice and obedience! We are promised through our faithfulness we will be given the righteous desires of our hearts! Why do I know God cares about Dance? Because it is one of our righteous desires! Love you dear friend...keep living and loving in the ways you do best!

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  2. OH MY GOODNESS!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MISS KATHLEEN!!! You are a true example of a woman of God. You taught me from the very beginning how to love. And I agree with you-God does care about dance and all of our righteous desires! He has provided a way for me all along. It just takes my finite brain awhile to figure it out!! I love you with all my heart and I'm proud to be your friend. xoxo

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  3. I love this. Thanks for sharing. I had just been thinking, "When and how am I ever going to finish writing the book I've been working on forever?" Then, I read your entry and felt better. Also, last night at our adult session of stake conference, a member of the presidency promised that between us and the Lord, our dreams can come true. I have also thought of the sacrifices you must have made and are making to send your children out on missions. Your effects as a woman of faith are immeasurable.

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  4. OHhhhhh CHRISTIE!!! I LOVE you and MISS you! You are a woman of faith! Your example of goodness and light has always been an inspiration to me. Thank you for being a true example of a disciple of Jesus Christ. Thank you for being my friend. And...we only live 30 miles away from each other...WE HAVE to get together...SOON!!! I love you. <3

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